Life where listening is not as easy as seeing.
In my many years of working with children and youths to assess them for learning difficulties, I have found auditory processing deficit to be more common than visual processing deficit. When I did informal surveys of my college students in the psychology classes, this was also true. This suggests that chances are, there is a greater probability that children or adults around you have auditory weaknesses.
What are some of the indicators for auditory weaknesses? Auditory processing can involve comprehension, memory, and oral skills.
Signs of auditory weaknesses include difficulties with:
1. Understanding what was just being said (comprehension): Watching and following fast-paced interactions in movies or TV shows can be challenging. When someone says something and everyone is laughing, you may laugh with them but you didn’t really “get it.” As a result, it is difficult to make quick or witty responses in social situations, not easy to be funny in a spontaneous way, and frequently you walk away with regrets of “what I could have said” in self-defense (insight occurring a bit too late).
2. Following verbal instructions (comprehension and memory): It is challenging to take good notes in an instructional setting (like a classroom or seminar) since you have difficulty retaining the information while you’re writing at the same time. You end up looking over the neighbor’s notes or watch them to figure out what you’re supposed to do now. You end up wrongfully accused of not paying attention or not following direction by the teacher (in school) or parent (at home).
3. Remembering the names of new friends you just met recently (memory): It is hard to remember acquaintances’ names and getting connected with less familiar people. In this world of networking, this can lead to frustration as people’s names are the first step in getting connected.
4. Social settings (oral skills): This can be somewhat anxiety provoking. It’s not easy to go to parties where you are expected to socialize with others and do casual types of conversation because social settings generally require spontaneous verbal interaction (unlike work/classroom meetings where you can come prepared).
Suggestions for overcoming auditory weaknesses:
1. Compensate by using your (visual) strengths to help the auditory weaknesses. Look for visual cues to help figure out and/or remember things. Take notes, whether it’s information or an appointment as it will help you to remember important details. Yes, sit next to someone who takes good notes (I did).
2. Do not be afraid to ask the speaker to repeat. It is amazing how someone else in the listening group would appreciate that you asked for repetition (you’d be surprised that you’re in good company).
3. Repeat back to the speaker what was said as a way of confirming or clarifying that you heard correctly. For example, when asked to do some favor, you can say, “So you want me to drop this in the mailbox for you?”
4. If someone is pitching for some endorsement, ask for a brochure, or some written material. Tell them that you will “look over” and decide. I have done this all my life and it allowed me time to review while reading the material to think through before making any decision.
Suggestions for helping someone with auditory weaknesses:
1. Repeat verbal directions. And when you repeat, try to rephrase it instead of repeating word for word because the listener may have had trouble understanding it the way it was said the first time. An auditory learner may retort with “I heard you the first time.” But don’t let that stop you from repeating yourself because someone else would appreciate your repeated words. If you’re talking to a child, it is best to make eye contact before talking to them.
2. Provide visual cues when giving verbal directions. It will help to draw a picture or diagram on a piece of paper or a board when explaining something. It will sink in better. When giving driving directions, instead of “make right here, make left there,” it is helpful to say, “When you see the McDonald’s restaurant, then, make right at that corner.” It will help the listener to visualize what to expect as they drive.
3. Try not to go on and on with a story or instruction. Fast talk with much embellishment does not help this person. Stop and summarize or paraphrase what you were saying, so it will give the listener chance to understand and digest. Ask if they’re following so far and look for signs. Sometimes, poor auditory person may say “yes” to the question because they’re too shy or embarrassed to say that they are NOT following or understanding. If this is a child and you just gave some directions, you may check for understanding by saying, “So what are you supposed to do?”
4. Best preferred way of compliment or praise would be a written note, a text, an email, or a card. This person will be encouraged and cherish the note! If this is your child, post their art work or awards in visible places.